I recently reorganized our pictures on the computer (I LOVE organizing) and I was looking at old pictures and videos of the kids from when they were born up until now. I was kind of emotional, how could I forget them in those first months of their lives, when they are so innocent and helpless and beautiful, so quickly. And how much time we spent just looking at them! And it wasn't even that long ago for Ginger. Now it seems like I am just looking at the tops of their heads all day long and telling them 'no!' or 'stop!'. And then feeling awful when Tipo gets this defeated look in his eyes and says "oh, sorry mom" and turns and walks away. Or Ginger scrunches up her face and cries and puts her arms out to me for a hug. Breaks my heart every time. So why do I keep doing it?
How quickly we forget!
We will all fail our children in one way or another, no mother is perfect! I hope that doesn't sound negative, it's not meant to be. I just mean that we can't beat ourselves up for not doing everything perfectly. I know I struggle with feeling like a failure a lot of times because I am not acting like the mother I always thought I would be.
A current LDS leader and Apostle Elder M Russell Ballard said:
"There s no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family....What matters is that a mother lovers her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else." {Daughters of God}Being a mother is being in a relationship with your child.
Being a mother is not a set of tasks to accomplish and we aren't graded on how well we do compared to other mothers. (Erickson, 135)
Erickson, Janet J. "Mothers as Nurturers." Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspective. (2012): 128-139. Print.